You’re like a drug
Graceful like a dove
Grateful for your love
Addictive to the T
But still you’re good for me
Dont know if it will last
And even if it doesn’t its nice to just bask
In the feeling of us
I hope its not just lust
To let things flow is hard for me
Yet you make it so easy to just be
You’re like a drug
Except it feels like a healthy nug
A breath of fresh air
A light that shines in my despair
You just happen to be so rare.
Sometimes
Sometimes i wish you never put hands on me
Sometimes i wish we were really meant to be
Sometimes i wish things went another way
Instead of the way it led us to today
Sometimes i dont care and im fine
Other times the PTSD blows my mind
Sometimes im good and i feel free
Other times i feel locked in the chamber of my reality
Sometimes i hate you and i know thats how its supposed to be
But the hate eats me alive its a never ending cycle of grief
Sometimes i want to betray myself and go back
Until i snap out of the desperation that i have packed
Most times i dont think about you
Most times i know that you were just another fool
Most times i know that its self harm to think about a time when you and me were warm
Love
It came so easily
But was it love or just lust that I accepted
Which was the frequency?
Never mind that because although the love you gave did end up pleasing me
Still
Something was missing, my usual carefree spirit was wheezing for air
As if you sucked it all out of me and left me without a care
As if I give and give and give
And I live to forgive then relive
But to see your highs while I stay low
A leech you are
Protected by your costume of snow
In the moment it’s bliss
When I look back I reminisce
On how I missed out on an equal give and take
Choosing someone who I knew would end up giving me heartache
All for something that felt good but when I wake up I see it was all fake
I see past the desire of feeling love
It’s all about you, it always was
The most beautiful boogeyman
Stuck on your looks and I really should have looked passed that
You were my favorite nightmare but for what?
It’s just a fact that it was all For a quick fuck and a trip to the land of unseen
I’ll tell you what
Tonight, I’ll see you again in my dreams
